Posts Tagged ‘Canada’

March the Twentyseventh

Today Monkey went to the opening match.  This year the opening was played against the strong Toronto FC side.  Of course by strong Monkey means pathetic, a disgrace, black stain on the already foul milquetoast image that Ontario infects on the rest of the world.  One wonders why anyone would use a Toronto FC kit for anything other than it’s intended purpose, wiping the oily sludge out from under the fingernails of ex-con quickie lube workers.  Yet lo, and be hold Monkey sees you people over in the corner and sure enough, you are wearing the damn things.  Have you escaped a mental institution?  Lose a bet that would have seen you gain peerage had you won?  It can’t be that actually are a Toronto FC supporter.  Does such a thing exist?  Yet, here you are, sullying Monkey’s fine day with your blithering idiocy.  So, go on, cheer for your doomed boys and be sure to enjoy that long dark bus ride home where you will have plenty of time to contemplate yet another lose to the Crew.

Monkey is waiting for you in the parking lot.


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